Do you remember the advice Miles gives to Joel in the classic 80s film Risky Business? Joel’s parents had just left town leaving him alone for a week, and Miles is encouraging him to make some changes: “Sometimes, Joel, you just gotta say, what the fuck.” In my own, small way, this has become a New Year’s resolution of mine, and I can say so far so good.
A couple of days each week I work at a large, socially progressive research university. The days I am on campus I like to swim laps for exercise. I’ve been doing this for years. And for years, the days I am going to undress in the locker room in front of other men, I have always chosen to wear my “normal” underwear. In 2020, however, I’ve decided to say what the fuck and show my true colors.
After my swim and shower, when I get dressed I put on my favorite undies – satin bikinis, thongs, and even lace. And you know what? I no longer care if people see me wearing them. I was always shy about showing these kinds of things. In my last relationship, my partner made me feel there was something wrong with me for being into underwear, especially the designs I like most. I have a different partner now, and she digs my love of underwear. Her approval, I think, has given me the desire to flaunt the things I really like to wear.
I also decided, what’s the worst that can happen? Somebody might say something to me? Unlikely, but ultimately I now understand that this would reveal more about them than me.
I started tepidly, and would quickly put my pants on after pulling on my thong. After a couple of months, I now take my time. I am sure it comes as no surprise that no one has said a thing to me. I have gotten a couple of double-takes, mostly from older men and on days I wore satin undies, bikinis that many would identify as panties.
I like who I am, and as strange as it might sound to many, underwear is part of how I express and define myself. That’s why this year I’ve decided to say what the fuck, and not be ashamed of who sees me in the things I like to wear. If you haven’t taken this kind of step, if you are like the older me that was shy and ashamed of liking to wear, I’d like to encourage you to think otherwise, and not to be shy or afraid about showing these “unconventional” things you like to wear.
Be who you are! If anyone isn't interested in that than you know you don’t need them in your life. I mean, what the fuck?
Signing off!
-Brian
15 comments
My experience is pretty much the same as Brian’s. For many years I enjoyed wearing thongs and skimpy underwear only in secret and the feedback from girlfriends was generally negative, or neutral at best.
During a phase when I was single, I decided that I wasn’t going to hide any more. I’d like to claim that I just didn’t care, but in truth I had to screw up quite a bit of courage to strip down to a thong in the changing room at the gym. But, like Brian, I had no negative comments – in fact, I don’t think anybody really paid any attention at all.
Now I’m quite comfortable with being seen in a thong, and even wear one on the beach and at the hotel pool on holiday. Sometimes people look, but that could be just because you don’t see many men dressed that way. My current girlfriend is quite happy to be seen with me, though she does think that some people probably mistake me as gay. There are worse things, and that really, genuinely doesn’t bother me.
I love my sexy undies. They make me feel great when I’m walking around my home in them. No body sees me in my horny undies and I’m to paranoid to hang them out to dry. Someone might see them and find out I’m bi.
I agree with Yoshi, this is inspiring. I am really trying to get over my shyness about these kinds of things.
What the fuck indeed! Way to go Brian! Be true to who you and don’t worry about what others think. I say this to you, but also to me, as most often I’m the old version of you, quickly dressing so nobody will see what I’m wearing and judge me.
Too often we judge ourselves by what we perceive others classify as normal. We worry about being judged by strangers who have little to no impact on our daily lives and who we quite likely may never see again! I’ve often wondered how many other men out there would love to wear racy or exotic underwear but never will because of what others think.
As for me, I much prefer some satin or lace bikinis or thongs to a pair of unimaginative floppy cotton boxers or briefs any day of the week.
Thanks for sharing your story!
Hi, I can relate! That’s very inspiring! I am super shy and would feel judged even though I love exotic underwear. Thank you for writing that