Periodically, I ask myself why I like good underwear so much and how my interest in it all got started. In thinking it over I’ve come to the conclusion that my love of good underwear happened incrementally over the years. And I thought I’d share some of that story here.
In my mid-20s, I went to graduate school in Boston. There was a branch of the women-owned/centric sex store Good Vibrations (the same store that originated in San Francisco) in the city that would come to my school once a year and give these sex-positive talks about pornography and sex toys. These talks opened my mind in many ways. After one of them, I visited a department store in downtown Boston and bought a three-pack of some pretty skimpy, brightly colored briefs. I had never worn anything like these before, and I loved them!
Like many young men, in high school and college I had succumbed to the peer pressure to wear boxers, so wearing these new form-fitting briefs was a revelation. I loved how they felt and looked. It took such pride in seeing myself in these briefs and took a lot of self-portraits in them. I don’t think I waited long before I went back to the store to buy another pack of these colorful, form-fitting briefs, really just to more fully discover my new found joy in wearing underwear.
After grad school, I moved to New York to start my career. One afternoon I visited an adult store and bought my first thong. It was all on a whim, and yet I was really excited to try it on. This proved kind of a fiasco as the woman in my life at the time did not all go for it, and was actually very judgmental and shaming. It was a nice bright yellow thong, but I think I wore it once or twice before it found its way to the trashcan, because somehow I let her make me feel like a freak for wanting to wear it.
In hindsight, I regret that I let her shame me, but regardless of how she felt a seed was planted. From that point on, I became a bit more experimental in my underwear choices. This was about 10-15 years ago, and the fabric choices available for men’s underwear were just beginning to evolve. Not long after I got the thong, I visited a Jockey outlet store in Maine and purchased a pack of sheer, black nylon bikinis. My partner found these a little strange, but accepted them, and more importantly accepted me wearing them. And I loved them and wore them all the time. I enjoyed wearing the tight, stretchy fabric, and the sheer look thrilled me.
A few years later I started swimming. For much of my youth, I was very athletic and was a huge runner. After many years and many more miles running on city streets, I started having knee problems so I decided to switch sports. I started swimming laps. When I first got started, I wore the baggy swim shorts expected of men in the States. I was struck to see so many other men at the pool in swim briefs. Not long after I got started, I bought my first speedo. Not only did I feel empowered wearing it, I felt equally as empowered being seen in it. As much as I enjoyed swimming, I took pleasure in pulling on my swim briefs in the locker room and slowly walking out to the pool. Perhaps in a quiet way, this was the first time I used my underwear (or something like it) to strut my stuff.
Like anyone searching for alternative lifestyles, the internet opened new doors. As I’ve continued to explore my love of good underwear with progressive and showy designs, the internet has provided a ton of new resources. Not only was I able to discover Body Aware and other great underwear designers, but I also came to recognize that I was not alone in this obsession, that there are a lot of other men out there like me, both gay and straight, who love the thrill of high-quality, sexy underwear. And I think knowing I am not alone has helped me embrace this part of myself, and now I unashamedly and proudly wear my thongs, satin, and lace, knowing this is a healthy part of my self-expression and personal discovery.
Today I have a partner who not only fully supports my love of well designed, sexy underwear but is also as thrilled and excited as I am in seeing what new things I get to wear each month. This has become a thrilling and fun part of our relationship!
Now that I’ve shared a bit of my story, I would love to hear back from some of you! How did you get into underwear? Was there a first pair or experience that made you want more? Kept you on the hunt for new, classy, flashy, sexy, and comfortable things to wear? Please share!
Signing off for now!
I sometimes shudder when I think what we were expected to wear in days gone by and how uncomfortable they were – how on earth were boxer shorts supposed to support one – it was simply something not discussed – although suddenly springing to mind was an exchange visit at school when we went swimming and a French lad had such better swimming trunks than our passion killers. All the lads commented. I feel sorry for previous generations of men who were not able to have our experiences but then I consider what men wore in medieval times and think where did it all go so wrong.
I was raised in a conservative household, and tighty-whities were the only underwear I knew growing up. The jockstraps we had to wear for gym were purely utilitarian and didn’t feel any different than my everyday underwear, so I missed the point at the time.
Fast forward to college, and my mind and outlook were greatly expanded. That’s when I tried on my first thong underwear, which fit and felt great – but that my girl friend at the time just didn’t understand.
That was before the days of boxer-briefs of fashion jockstraps, but I’ve tried those over the years as well. My new favorite style is the “backless brief” style of jockstrap – looks like a low rise bikini from the front, but the back is open. And fortunately I found a lady that understands me.
Thanks for sharing your story, Brian. I think mine is much more simple. In the 6 grade I started taking karate lessons and my mom bought me my first jockstrap. It was so much fun to wear I used for more than just my classes.